i just might die with a smile on my face

lately i have been fairly amazed with the world. just how everythings works. i get like this whenever i take up being an amatuer astronomer again. the amazing things make me nervous. i'm incapable of enjoying things. like woody allen. you know he was going to title annie hall, anhedonia, which is someone who is in capable of enjoying things. it sounds like a greek colony. i'm glad he titled it annie hall instead.

i think i drank a cockroach last night, just a baby one that was in my water glass. i was really thirsty. i had been to the bounty and a nice man named richard who was an old punk rocker and had studied theology bought me a shot of jager. krista was there too. she had some guy named harry hitting her. she looked uncomfortable. after i'd gotten three cigarettes off richard we went to the shortstop and drank drinks we shouldn't have. whenever krista ends up sitting on the curb smoking she is most certainly drunk. i was sharing a cigarette with an italian guy. i think he was unhappy. i think i told him he needed to think positively. i think i actually touched his head with my index finger and said, you gotta use this thing. then i pointed at ryan and krista, sitting on the curb, two steps from the gutter, and said, those guys are great.

forget it.