sleepover

i have a hard time sleeping when i am home. i'm not really sure why. sometimes i think that it is just because i want to be up and enjoying my family's company instead of sleeping late. it is nice to be up in the morning with my mom, drinking coffee and working on the crossword. but not sleeping catches up with me and i have been dead tired the last two days from staying up too late and getting up too early.

i went out with my friends, paul and his girlfriend, megan, and whitney. we went to a strip club in portland called, the acropolis. they had four dollar steak specials and over thiry beers on tap. and naked girls. the naked girls were pretty easy to ignore because they weren't very good at stripping. they really just walked around the stage and fondled their boobs. one actually fondled her boobs them moved her hands to her mouth to cough then went back to fondling her boobs.

after the acroplis paul went to bed because he is working stiff now, leaving me, whitney, and megan to sit around and talk. i was planning on retiring early, but there was something nostalgic in the three of us sitting around. because of my fatigue, i guess, and the fact that megan and whitney were drinking and i was obstaining, they talked a lot more than me and i just allowed myself to sit and listen. they talked about friendships that fall apart. whitney and i have been friends for over ten years, our friendship has fallen apart more than once. but she didn't talk about that, she talked about other friends, people i didn't know. then, somehow, they started talking about what type of jewels they would want in a wedding ring. they asked me what i wanted. i said i didn't know. whitney surprised me by talking about too girls she works with who have these ostentatious rocks on their fingers and how she kind of liked them, but likes smaller things better, things that are less obvious. the entire conversation seemed obvious to me, three girls, sitting around talking about wedding rings. it just wasn't something we talked about, we got drunk and made fun of strippers, then came home and watched episodes of degrassi. then we talked about wedding rings? the conversation was niave and innocent, but at the same time it made me feel like we were all on the brink of our lives shifting. that we all knew more now, than we ever have in the past five years, that we would all someday probably wear a wedding ring and its existance was something we cared about.

we ended up going to bed around five. and i woke up 4 and a half hours later and left notes for both of them, wishing them merry christmases, and then walked to my sister's house a few blocks away, in the cold, bright morning.